Sunday, October 4, 2009

On Love

All you need is love (name that band)

She love me... she loves me not... (name hat game)

Love is patient, love is kind, etc... (name that book)

I'm not even gonna mess around here, I just read a post by Irish Gumbo about love and now I'm waxing thoughtful. (Which is unusual these days, I'm running low on wax.) The first paragraph talks about all the ways we learn about love and the second about all the ways we loose it. That's what got me to wondering... is it possible to loose love?

If you're allergic to religion don't click away here, I'll keep it brief and non-confrontational. The Bible says, and I'm paraphrasing here, that God gives without repentance. Which is a fancy way of saying that God is not what we used to call an Indian Giver on the playground. If God gives it to you, no matter how things go after that, you've still got it. If He says He loves you, there is not any imaginable course of action that could cause you to fall away from that.

So now I look at my own life and wonder if that doesn't apply to me as well. As a child I fell into the love of my parents and the rest of my family. Luckily for me I have Super Sweet parents who never did anything to me to make me doubt their love for me; at least not in any real sort of way, restrictions on teenage lifestyles aside, they did it out of love after all. But looking around, The Missus has some issues going on in her family, but does she still love the one that left. I'm thinking that it's so, otherwise she wouldn't be bothered by it.

As I grew up my boyish heart turned to thoughts of love, or possibly it was just the testosterone cocktail coursing through my veins. With the eye of (relative) maturity it's easy to see that most of what happened to me in those years was just puppy love, or lust, or what have you. There was only occasionally any glimmer of anything even remotely approximating love that transpired between myself and any of the girls that I dated back then. The one point of interest is to look back and see in the (very) small handful of relationships where we got it just a little bit right. Mostly I never give even a passing thought to past relationships, but for one or two, where there was that tiny germ of proto-love, something remains. Not anything to worry about, don't misunderstand me one bit. There's no interest in rekindling old flames, but that tiny drop of love warms my heart when an old girlfriend turns up on MyFace or SpaceBook and is happily married with beautiful children. Apparently there's no return on that deposit but it seems to remain proportional.

Until I met The Missus my friends always received the greater portion of my love. I still maintain a fierce love for my Bros from way back, even though contact these days is sporadic at best. Even the one guy I was always at odds with, the one friend that's "broken up" with me and vise versa numerous times. The bond of love that is true friendship maintains a place for that guy in my heart. I still care.

And finally, to wax theological once again (just briefly), to quote Gumbo, "Love will not feed you, or clothe you, or put a roof over your head. It will, however, sustain you." In my life I've seen that God's love is enough. The Bible says not to worry about money or clothes or even what I will eat. God cares about the birds of the field and sustains them, how much more will he sustainsus that He loves. (that's Us as in Humanity en toto not just us the Christians).

As the guy who's responsible for bringing home the bacon (for six) a good deal of my mental process is dedicated to our sustenance. Sustaining us. Things go best when I rely on my moto, paraphrased from the Good Book, "I may not ever be rich or have nice things, but God loves me and I know he's not going to let me and mine starve on His watch."

Anyway, I don't feel like that was terribly coherent but it was on my mind this morning. And now my Short People are up and want me to make waffles. Time to make sure the Love is baked in...



Irish Gumbo said...

"...that tiny germ of proto-love..."

My friend, don't worry about coherency, that was brilliant.

Go, make waffles, and know that I am humbled and honored by your words :)

Coelecanth said...

I discovered late one night after an evening of drinking with old friends that love does not come in different types. The love I felt for them was exactly the same as the love I felt for the woman I was "In love" with at the time. The only difference was the intensity of that love. That was the point I stopped feeling guilty about the twinge I'd get when I thought about old flames.

It's was proven true again with the birth of my daughter. If the love I still feel for my first girlfriend is the light of a single candle, then the love I feel for my daughter is a ten thousand watt arc lamp. Don't ask me to show it to you because you'd go blind. But in the end they are both still light.

Thanks for this post, I'll go read Gumbo's now. Oh, and hey, you don't need to apologize to me at least for talking about your religion. It's obviously fundamental to who you are and part of the point of reading blogs is to see the world through other's eyes.

Besides, despite being an atheist I believe very strongly in freedom of religion, freedom of thought and freedom of speech. The only way you could offend me would be to try and deny me those freedoms and somehow I just don't see you doing that.

Thanks again for a thoughtful and thought provoking post.

The Mister said...

Wow... thanks guys. (grin)