Thursday, October 2, 2008

Honey! I'm Home

After the long battle to get the short people fed, washed and in bed tonight we had a few friends over to watch the debate. We had an hour before it started so we sat in the kitchen chatting about, what else, our kids. (Their punkin is in the same class as ours.)

My mind wandered a little bit and started thinking about the ideal homecoming. (Ya know, instead of getting headbutted in the crotch three times and screamed at for three hours.)

It starts with the kids running at me in their usual fashion and then, quick as lightening, out comes the can of ether. *SPFFT* *SPFFT* *SPFFT* (THUMP) (Thump) (thump) "Daddy! I can't feel my body! Ha ha!" *SPFFT* (Silence)

Just kidding. I would never subdue my lovely short people with starting fluid. Chloroform is a much better choice, you don't get so much of a hangover.

KIDDING!


But seriously folks. I did have rather a nice time with the short people today. For the most part they were content to just run around and scream while I dozed and occasionally spoke up in the interest of safety. Dinner was the usual long process but they actually ate some tonight and didn't wind up screaming for fish crackers from their little beds. There was even freshly baked apple pie and Grampa came up to enjoy a slice with us. And now... the house is silent, our friends are arriving, and two people who want to be Vice President of the United States of America are about to say things on TV that will likely cause laughter.

P.S. Despite the sidebar indicating that I haven't updated Simple Terms in five weeks, I HAVE! There's a few things over there that you may or may not enjoy reading depending on the geek factor in your life.

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4 comments:

Manager Mom said...

OK - so you have picky eaters too. When you say fish crackers do you mean Goldfish? Or some other magical cracker that the picky kids will actually eat without complaining?

Pamela said...

Oh no, he means Goldfish. But wouldn't it be HIGHlarious if they were asking for crackers that tasted like fish? How's that for a WTF moment?
"We want fishy crackers"
"Here's the Goldfish"
"NO NO NO NO NO!!!! I want the Pickled Herring Flavoured ones. PUT THAT CHEDDAR CRAP AWAY, Mama!!!!"

Sorry. We just watched She Who Will Not Be Named say things like, "We must conserve our hydrocarbons" for an hour and a half. My brain is fried.

Jill said...

Pamela, you kill me, I'll take some Pickled Herring over here please!

'That Girl' said...

love where this discussion went..